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November 26, 2012

Sex Energy ~ Managing Love’s Fire!

Happy Monday to You!

Wow – it’s so nice to be home!

Sleeping in my own bed, being in my own garden, and exercising in my own gym are always blessing to me, but such blessings are more tangible to us when we don’t have them for a while.

I’ve had several lovely rest days since getting back from seven weeks of teaching in Australia. I have enjoyed art, music, rock stacking, exercise, meditative hiking in the hills, create writing and even sleeping in.

I’m feeling very good! I hope each of you are too.


Sex energy is expressed as the total creative potential cultivated by the fire within; it is not just what comes through your genitals!

(For more on Mantak Chia’s books on managing sex energy go to:

Most people think of the sex energy center of our body in a very limited way; in a way that is consistent with social (religious) programming. The result is that when people talk, read, or hear about sex energy, they immediately think of acts of sexual intimacy.

What Is Sex Energy?

Sex energy is the base creative energy of life itself. It is the energy liberated by the process of transformation. The process of fulfilling our desires to experience life creates the impetus for sex energy.

“Love” is the word that describes what sex energy really is. In my diagram above, you can see the word “LOVe” at the top:

The “L” in LOVe stands for Desire or Life.
The “O” stands for ZERO or Pure Potential.
The “Ve” stands for volt electron, or the electromotive force of the universe within and around us.

Sex energy is created by the union of the female (yin) and male (yang) energies. The females/yin energies of union, inward-flow, cooling and slowing are constantly being met by the male/yang energies of transformation (individuation), outward-flow, warming, and speeding up.

As you can see in my diagram above, the two qualities of yin and yang (IS and isn’t) produce “Te”, which means The Creation in Taoist terms.

Each of is a creation that creates within The Creation or life itself. Spirit is the word that represents yin becoming yang or yang becoming yin; Spirit means transformation or change and change is constant in the universe.

There are no exceptions to that.

You see that I’ve listed the names of my 4 Doctors within the big circles (Dr. Quiet, Dr. Diet, Dr. Happiness and Dr. Movement).

They each serve as essential functional modes of energy expression in our lives and are essential to healthy management of our sexual (creative) energies.

Dr. Quite and Dr. Diet represent the female energies, while Dr. Happiness and Dr. Movement represent the male energies as a general theme.

If our balance of female energies and male energies is optimal, so too is our capacity to create our life and participate in the lives of others.


To help you understand the basic concept of sex energy, I’d like to use a campfire as a working example.

To start a campfire, you need two types of wood to burn. First, you need something that has enough substance to it to last a while or your fire will not be sustainable. This is the yin or female component.

Then you need some kindling wood to start the fire; kindling wood needs to be smaller pieces, preferably of dry wood expressing the more masculine, combustible nature. Kindling wood will typically ignite even with a well-managed spark or two from flint stones or a match (a reason to create).

By our individual natures, some of us have little fires or a weak constitution. Such people have to be careful about how they use their fire because there isn’t enough to do too much (creative) work.

By the time your body uses what it needs to create and recreate itself each day, there is not a lot left for other creative pursuits.

Those with small (creative) fires often find themselves in relationships with, or working for those with big fires. The result is that they try to meet the demands of the “big fire” person(s) in their life; soon they have many things on their little fire but because it takes too long to cook multiple items on a little fire, challenges arise.

Therefore, those with little fires have to be careful about self-management or they simply burn out. This often expresses itself in a string of relationships that are failing from lack of connection and projects that never seem to reach completion.

Some of us are naturally endowed with a good constitution and therefore, are like big campfires.

Those with “big fire” in them also face management challenges. They often forget that their “big fire” must be tended to because a big fire produces a lot of heat-energy and has a big appetite!

If the “big fire” person isn’t careful, they can get so excited about their projects and passions that they forget to tend to the fire appropriately (eat and rest).

The result is that they can run out of energy and burn out or go cold; excessive yin.

Big fire people also suffer from the misconception that others can produce as much energy or output as they can and often suffer from the challenges of expecting too much from others with smaller fires.

Managing Your Sex/Creative Energies

We each have a responsibility to ourselves – first and foremost. That means being clear about what our “core values” are.

  • What are the core values that you must live in order to be healthy, and be happy within?
  • What are the core values that support the creation of your specific dream, goal or objective at this time in your life?

The concept of having a dream bigger than your nightmare is an essential motive for the creation, and adherence to your own core values.

I offer a step-by-step process for identifying your chief dream, goal or motive and establishing core values in PPS Success Mastery Lesson 1. How To Find and Live Your Legacy (available at

For each additional person, place, or thing we add to our life, we increase the amount of sex energy (fire/metabolism) it takes to manage, and create effectively.

If we are not careful, we can easily end up over-committing ourselves.

Soon, we have all the expectations and expenses that come with each project or possession we try to maintain, yet, we lack the sex energy to cultivate and maintain all the relationships we’ve committed ourselves to.

Therefore, as the number of commitments to people, places, and things goes up, so to must our commitment to living our core values go up!

Burnout begins as smoldering fire(s). The balance of wood (yin) and fire (yang) isn’t adequate to keep things moving efficiently.

In this state of being, people are far more likely to eat quick energy foods, and typically eat foods with low nutrient density and therefore, lack life-force energy (sex energy).

If this happens to the degree that our body-mind can’t generate adequate metabolism and resources to maintain itself, we too begin to smolder within.

This expresses itself as fatigue, lack of sex drive, lack of participation in key relationships, and eventually turns into illness. Illness marks the return of the PainTeacher.

The PainTeacher always comes to direct us in the opposite direction we’ve been going with regard to self-management. If we keep taking drugs and not listening to the PainTeacher, we invite death!


Sex energy is a term commonly understood as the energy we use for sexual intercourse.

Sex energies, as expressed in the second chakra of the seven chakra system are actually the energies used to create life in the entire human body-mind construct.

How we manage ourselves determines the health and vitality of our body-mind, which is the basis for creating in relationships with other persons, places or things.

How we manage our sex energies in life largely determines what kind of life-experiences we have and who is willing to participate with us in life.

When your sense of sexual energy diminishes, it is not only expressed in your sexual performance, but in all aspects of your life. Having a clearly stated dream (direction) and core values to guide your choices is an essential self management strategy to keep your sexual energy balanced and healthy.

For more help restoring your natural sex energies and regaining your zest for life, consider the following resources I’ve created for helping you avoid unnecessary visits from your PainTeacher:
1. PPS Lesson 1
2. The Last Four Doctors ebook – How To Get Healthy Now!
3. How To Eat Move and Be Healthy!
4. You Are What You Eat

Enjoy creating with your sex energies and managing your fire today!

Love and chi,
Paul Chek